Some of the sex in Fifty Shades Darker is seriously hot — heeeeeey there, ice cream oral👋. But some of it is seriously impractical. I’m sorry, I don’t own a boat we can bang on, and I’m not trying to get arrested in an elevator for indecent exposure. But there are still plenty of steamy scenes you can use as inspo in bed. Here are six sex positions that will have your inner goddess doing back flips, or whatever.
1The Lipstick Lock Down

Ana used lipstick on Christian to mark all the places she *couldn’t* touch him, but that honestly sounds like zero fun. Try marking each other using lipstick or (even whipped cream) with all the places you *do* want to be touched. Then, let your partner’s hands or mouth roam to those spots.

2The Power Shower

Make like Christian and Ana in their unrealistically perfect shower sex scene and try adding some water to your fully-clothed bone sesh. Get a seriously heavy duty bath mat to avoid slippage, and try stripping *in* the shower before he pins you against a wall. Spoiler: this is pretty much impossible, so just hold on to a railing and go at it whatever way works for you.

3Bend and Spread ‘Em

If you’re not quite ready for the play room but have graduated from plain old handcuffs and whips (so vanilla!), give a spreader bar a try. Playing with restraint and range of motion can be a serious turn on. To take this toy for an easy test drive, try attaching it to your ankles, and bending over a comfy bed while he enters you doggy style.

4The Total Meltdown

Okay, besides what is sure to be a stupidly messy clean up, this is one that the book pretty much nails as-is. No need to modify. Restrain your arms and have him feed you ice cream, gently spreading some on all your sensitive areas, AKA nipples. Let him lick it off and experiment with temperature play while his very cold tongue delivers some ice-cold oral. Then go ahead and have what will definitely be some very sticky missionary sex.

5Pool Table Paradise

First, start with an argument you want to bet on, like Christian and Ana’s dispute over whether or not they’ll go back into the play room. Want him to wash the dishes for a week? Call his mom back so she stops texting you asking where he is? Great. Start up a friendly game of pool, and whoever wins the match gets their way. Winner also gets to be on top when you inevitably climb onto said pool table and bone. This way, everyone’s a winner.

6The Play Room Party

If you’re ready for full-on sensory overload, try incorporating multiple toys at once, like Ana’s “birthday present” to Christian. First, pop a bullet vibe inside your vagina, because this isn’t just about him, right? With nipple clamps in place and hands restrained behind your back, ease into anal with some butt-fingering foreplay first. If that’s not your thing, you can enjoy the dual-toy experience by removing the vibe and sliding onto your stomach, where he can enter from behind.

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  Some of the sex in Fifty Shades Darker is seriously hot — heeeeeey there, ice cream oral👋. But some of it is seriously impractical. I'm sorry, I don't own a boat we can bang on, and I'm not trying to get arrested in an elevator for indecent exposure. But...